“I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love.
With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.”
Jeremiah 31:3 NLT
For the last three years, during the Christmas season, I have searched intently for a special Christmas stocking for our soon to be daughter. Each person in our family has a unique stocking and I wanted her stocking to be just as special. To little avail, I had not found what I was looking for, at least not until last week. On my way to one store in particular, a phrase crossed my mind, “Love Waits”.
I walked in, went straight to looking for stockings and what I found, took me by surprise. I believe it was God’s sweet mercy comforting my weary, mama heart, restoring my hope. His joy and peace raining down.
This was my sweet surprise,
I had hoped that our daughter would be home before Christmas. I did not anticipate us waiting so long to be matched. It’s hard spending another holiday with the knowledge that there is a child that is ours yet she is not yet with us. She is still so far from home. This Christmas morning, her stocking will not hang waiting to be filled to the brim with Santa surprises. Even so, our love waits, busting at the seams. Our hearts and our home preparing room for one special girl.
I never anticipated the deep and tender love that I would experience for someone I have yet to meet. How my heart strings would be pulled taunt by someone who is oceans and continents away. How my heart would physically ache and thoughts of her would constantly be on the forefront of my mind.
Through our adoption journey, I have also come to a deeper understanding of the tender and steadfast love that my Heavenly Father has for me. How He loved me long before I knew what love was. He loved me first, pursuing me and never giving up on me. No matter how sinful and broken I am, He has always loved me. I am His. Adopted. A Child of God. Nothing can separate me from His love.
The love I have for our daughter, this love comes only from God. He compels me to love as He loves. Loving our daughter first, before she even knows what love is. Pursing her, despite her brokenness and loss, never giving up on her. Even so, my love is limited, imperfect, selfish at times. My love will fail often and I will never be enough. Yet I know, that He will continue to fill me as I pour myself out. He is more than enough. His love perfect and unfailing.
This steadfast love surrounds our daughter in Bulgaria. His love is preparing a way, making all things new. His love is limitless, crossing oceans and continents, calling her home.
God loved us so much that He sent His one and only Son into a world that had no room for Him. He was rejected, dying a criminal’s death. All so we could be called, Children of God. All so we could have eternal life in abundance.
As Christmas Day approaches, may we each pause and reflect, asking ourselves if we have taken time to prepare room? Our homes may be brimming with gifts and busting at the seams with holiday cheer yet are our hearts waiting with renewed wonder and hope-filled anticipation? Waiting for a God who never fails, never gives up on us, never stops loving us.
He waits. His love brimming over, busting at the seams, offering life in abundance. Offering us a forever family, an eternal home.
Do we have the eyes to see?
God’s love surrounds us. Steadfast, limitless, always enough. Providing hope, peace and joy. Leading us onward, calling us home.
Rabbi, I want to see. Open my eyes, open my heart, make room.
I once was blind but now I see.
In you, I am no longer lost, I am found.
I am Home.